Living Life on My Face

   I find myself in a place of not knowing what the heck I even want from my life. I mean, I know big picture stuff, but details, I have no idea. It's easy to make the blanket statement of wanting to make a difference, etc, but not so easy for, me personally, to even know what I want. I have the day off today, and I literally spent my morning trying to just figure out how I wanted to spend my day.

   It's been awhile since I've really sat down and just journaled, so I decided to go to the great local coffee shop and just journal for a bit. Let me tell you, I don't know why I don't just do that first. Before even thinking about anything else.

   Guys, I got a pretty cool picture for 2017, from my friend: " So I got this picture of a little yellow mug. I saw it sitting before you and I heard the Lord say ' you want some coffee, reach for the mug ' . I kept seeing different scenarios for different things you wanted and the means to have it was set before you in your reach. It was an exciting feeling that all you had to do was reach out and grab it! The mug being bright yellow and vibrant made me feel hope, comfort, belonging. Extend your arms. 
I feel yellow about your life. Sunshine, music, joy, youthfulness, hope, delight, future, dancing, lightheartedness. 

   This is so exciting to me! It filled me with almost a heavy feeling though. I thought it meant that I had to figure out what He wants to give me, but He reminded me today, that it's not about that. It's about living a life of seeking His face. It's about laying my life down at His feet and then taking His hand to hold through life.

   I haven't really been living a life of surrender. Like at all. Which is a problem unless I like being stressed out and aimless. For the record, I don't. So I mean... maybe it would be a good idea to surrender. Its my goal to be able to look back at this year and be able to see the pattern of my good good Father. Not to look back and see a list of things that I did. I don't ever want that to be my life. God's story is so much better than mine.

Shalom,