"We don't make fear based decisions"

  This week I had a conversation with an old friend. He was telling me about a scary thing that happened to him, and as a result, he wanted to say "I won't ever do ____ again.", but God Tom him, "No. We don't make fear based decisions."

  That shook me to the core. It wasn't the first time I'd heard someone say something like that, but it resignated with something that has already been churning inside me. 

  So much of my life has been fear based decisions. 
-my hatred of motercycles, because of losing someone close to me due to a crash. 
- the fact that I'm much more reserved and quiet, and less likely to do something new, when I'm with people I don't know well. 
- the fact that I won't drive a 4wheeler or jet ski. Only go along for the ride. 

  The list goes on. I'm afraid. Afraid of getting hurt. Or someone else will get hurt. Or someone will think less of me... You get the idea. 

  My life is fear based decisions. Do you know that a person misses out on a lot in life when they let fear be part of the decision making process. 

  Just something I'm thinking about/working on. 



Passions and efforts

  I'm reading a book called The Art of Work by Jeff Goins, and I had a revelation about myself and something I really want to do. 

  The chapter I read was talking about people who have passions/things they love to do, but they think that means that their passion should come easy. 

  I love music. I have been a singer since I was a baby, and worship is part of who I am as a person. That said, I don't know how to play any instruments or even harmonize. I've "tried" to learn before, but have never really stuck with it. That's silly, right?

  I think, because I've spent my life doing hard things I didn't want to do, I want the things I love, to come easy. 

  Growing up on a ranch, I worked hard. I never really wanted the ranch life, but I didn't have a choice. 

  It seems to me, that my way of controlling fun things in my life, is to ensure that the fun things are easy. 

  Even aside from the music things, there are many things that I truly enjoy, but I'm not very good at, because I quit trying when things get hard. (My one exception would probably be my relationships with people. I put a lot of myself and work into those.) I don't really have anything that I excel in. 

  This is a change I really want to make. 


We all have wisdom to give.

  I can't even tell you how many times I've sat down to write a post, and have not been able to get the words out. I'll have deep, personal things swirling inside me, and I want so badly to share, because this is my journey. I often have even thought through it before hand, pouring my heart out intricately, but when it comes to typing it out, sometimes I just can't. 

  I'm a bit of a conundrum. As y'all know, I'm introverted, but I'm also an incredibly open person. 

  I was raised, surrounded by people older than me. People who wanted to share their wisdom and opinion on things in my life. Most of these were unsolicited. I am still surrounded by people like that. It can be super annoying, but it taught me something valuable. 

  It taught me to be open with people. True, I tend to be a bit too trusting, but in many cases, my openness and willingness to trust has been helpful. 

  I strongly value mentor type people. I'm not even talking about someone who takes on the role of being your full time mentor. I'm talking about people who have wisdom and life experience. People who care enough to listen for a minute and help how they can. 

  I always seem to have something I'm dealing with, so I'm always on the look out for someone who has authority in that area. Someone I can open up to, and hopefully get a little piece of wisdom to help me grow. 

  In turn, I love to be the one listening and giving wisdom. I'm young, but I do carry wisdom, and because I've been taught to receive wisdom, I've also been taught the value of pouring it out. 

  That's really just the long way of me explaining why I love blogging. When I share my struggles, sometimes people speak wisdom into me. And when I share what I've learned in something, it's my way of giving wisdom out.