Hardest so far

The Hardest Thing I've Ever Experienced

   I've had a pretty easy life. I've never been abused, my parents are still married, I even grew up in a family who had enough money to get me my needs *and* wants. I consider myself blessed. I have experienced a few truly hear wrenching times, though. 

   I would have to say, leaving the Philippines was the hardest thing I've ever done. Now I don't know if it truly is, or if it's simply the freshest, but never the less, it's how I feel. 

   For three months I threw myself into the Filipino culture. I ate their food, attempted to speak their language, and really just did my best to be "one of them". During that time, I built friendships and created bonds. I "adopted" many little brothers and sisters. I went to the Philippines already being in love with it from my prior visit, but those three months made that country, those people, part of me. 
Ate Sha (Sharon)
El, Ervin, and Agaton

It's as if someone branded my heart. There isn't a day that goes by, that I don't think about the Philippines. Whether it be that I'm thinking about someone I love who is Filipino, reminiscing about the amazing times I had, or even dreaming about what kind of role the Philippines plays in my future, it crosses (and often stays for awhile) my mind everyday. I miss that beautiful place. I miss the smiling faces and the constant music. 

    Sometimes I feel lonely in America. I sometimes miss  my "me" time always being in public places, surrounded by people who would stop and stare at me because of my white skin. I miss the surprised look I always got when I said a word or two in Tagalog. I miss being called "Ate" everywhere I go. 

Donna Grace <3
  Leaving the Philippines ripped a part of my heart. It was almost more than I could bare. Being away is almost more than I can bare some days. Hard doesn't even begin to explain it. 



  1. We really do miss you..i hope we can see each other soon..i miss our sharing..i think we both are some kind of busy at this time..but you know your always in my heart love you..and always take care...😍😍😍

    1. I miss talking to you too. Oonga, we both are busy. You are always in my heart too, Ate ❤️❤️

  2. Sorry forgot to insert my account..hahaha..